It's been nearly three months since I started swimming at the YMCA pool. During this time, I’ve become acquainted with some regulars. I've received comments on how fast I swim with my head above water. It always feels good to hear positive remarks, though I don’t latch onto them like little kids.
This got me thinking about feedback and my last employer. The upper management there dispensed accolades upon rank-and-file employees at our monthly meetings. How did upper management know about performance down below? Through peer recommendations. I remember one colleague commenting on this practice: "It's nothing but the practice of 'you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours.'"
In reality, dispensing accolades is a form of feedback and serves important functions, such as expressing appreciation to colleagues. Feedback comes in many forms—my doctor’s office asks me to leave feedback after my visits, Walmart requests that I complete a survey after my purchases, teachers ask for evaluations, and employers give annual reviews.
As the Chinese saying goes, "礼尚往来" (lǐ shàng wǎng lái), meaning "Courtesy demands reciprocity" or "One good turn deserves another." This highlights the importance of mutual exchange and the significance of giving and receiving praise or feedback, much like the concept of "you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours."
Another common example of feedback today is seen on the internet. Internet celebrities and content creators often ask for likes or thumbs-up icons on their posts and videos. These simple actions provide immediate feedback on their work, indicating what resonates with their audience and encouraging them to continue creating engaging content.
If adults with mature minds benefit from feedback, children thrive on it from the adults in their lives. I remember one of my sisters often gives feedback to her son with comments like, "You are so smart!" However, effective feedback should be future-oriented, constructive, supportive, specific, motivational, reflective, and focused on praising effort.
For example: "I'm proud of the effort you put in. Where do you think you did best? Your speech was very impressive. Next time, try speaking a bit louder. Overall, great job! You broke your own record this time; can you outdo yourself next time?"
Feedback, whether from online interactions, professional settings, or personal relationships, can be a powerful tool for growth and motivation when given thoughtfully. Don’t be stingy in dispensing feedback in life; it can make a significant difference in someone’s journey toward improvement and success.