Something came up today that got me thinking. An acquaintance reached out to us from China, asking us how to apply for a Chinese visa for his son, who is a doctor in Kansas.
It reminded me of an old saying I heard long ago, perhaps from my grandma: "儿不嫌娘多" (Ér bù xián niáng duō), which means, "A child never complains about having too many mothers." Though it’s not a popular saying anymore, its meaning has always intrigued me.
The saying reflects the traditional view of a mother—as someone who loves unconditionally, cares for you when you’re young, and gives you red packets during the Spring Festival. The more people who love and care for you, the better. In ancient times, when childbirth was dangerous, women would often ask female friends or relatives to become godmothers for their babies. This way, if something happened to the biological mother, the godmother could step in and continue to care for the child.
I used to think this saying was outdated, given its origins and the advances in medicine. But now, I see it differently.
The saying still holds value today, emphasizing the benefits of having more people in one’s life who care and support you. It underscores the importance of strong family and social bonds.
In fact, you can see the saying as an ancient version of the concept of "connections." In the past, having more godmothers or maternal figures in one’s life meant a stronger support network, which could be crucial for survival and well-being. Today, this idea translates into the importance of connections and networks that extend to the next generation and beyond just family, influencing opportunities and support for future generations.
Just like our acquaintance reaching out to help his son get a visa, these connections continue to provide tangible benefits, demonstrating the lasting value of strong social and familial bonds across generations.
Times have changed tremendously, but the power of relationships and networks remains relevant, even as the nature of those connections evolves over time. This is evident when our old acquaintance from China reached out today for his son in Kansas. It shows that no matter how much time has passed or how far apart we are, these bonds still matter.