Yanwen’s blog

First of all, this is a good question but I don't have the answer to this question.

I recently came across an intriguing Chinese expression: 油腻感 (yóu nì gǎn), which translates to "a greasy feeling." Literally, it refers to the sensation of something being oily, heavy, or overly rich—unpleasant in an excessive way.

What makes this expression particularly interesting is its metaphorical use to describe people who exude an undesirable sense of excess, heaviness, or insincerity. It can evoke feelings of second-hand embarrassment, especially when someone is trying too hard to impress.

Figuratively, it’s often applied to describe individuals who come across as overly flashy or desperate to appear sophisticated, resulting in an impression of shallowness and pretense. 

More specifically, it's commonly used to critique middle-aged men who are seen as self-indulgent, pompous, or lacking in refinement. They might appear unkempt or give off an air of insincerity, marked by false confidence or vanity, as they attempt—unsuccessfully—to project success or charm.

The term gained traction in Chinese internet culture as a way to criticize these men who, in their efforts to seem worldly or accomplished or successful, actually seem out of touch or unappealing. 

"Greasiness" conveys a sense of complacency, indulgence, or someone who has grown too comfortable in their habits, trying too hard to be charming or sophisticated, but ultimately leaving a negative, off-putting impression. 

It's worth noting that this type of "greasy" man isn't exclusive to Chinese culture; men with inflated egos, overconfidence, and a desperate need to project success exist in every society. 

Whether in the East or the West, the traits of vanity, insincerity, and excess seem to transcend cultural and national boundaries. It's no exaggeration to say that men—no matter where they are from—are often susceptible to letting their egos get the better of them, creating the same uncomfortable, greasy impression, even when they're trying to achieve the opposite.

Most Chinese are familiar with the famous line from Romance of the Three Kingdoms: "话说天下大势，分久必合，合久必分" (huà shuō tiān xià dà shì, fēn jiǔ bì hé, hé jiǔ bì fēn) "In the grand scheme of the world, long periods of division will inevitably lead to unity, and long periods of unity will inevitably lead to division." This reflects the cyclical nature of Chinese history, marked by repeated patterns of fragmentation and reunification.

While we know these words, we often don’t dive deeper to ask: what are the forces behind division and unity? Why has China achieved prolonged periods of unity, whereas Europe has struggled to unify?

This is a complex and interesting topic, but here’s a brief overview of the key forces in China and Europe.

Forces of Division

Divisive forces arise from differences in ethnicity, language, religion, ideology, and culture. When groups prioritize their unique identities over shared interests, unity becomes challenging. The stronger the sense of localism, the weaker the central government’s ability to maintain control. Historically, weak central governments make division more likely. External forces can subvert a unified country, as we often see today.

Forces of Unity

Unity is driven by shared identity, such as common language, culture, history, and geography. A strong central government and political stability are essential to foster a sense of unity. When effective governance addresses the needs of different groups, the desire for separatism is minimized. 

Interestingly, external forces can also unite otherwise divided groups for survival. A clear example is how China came together during the Japanese invasion. Additionally, charismatic leaders at critical moments can inspire people to overcome divisions and unite around a common cause.

Why China Has Achieved Long Periods of Unity

China’s long shared history, culture, and identity, spanning over 2,000 years, are key reasons for its enduring unity. Chinese nationalism has been further strengthened under the current government, which appeals to the idea of national rejuvenation and the "China Dream." This vision unites the population, and for centuries, the forces of unity have outweighed those of division.

Why Europe Struggles with Unity

Europe’s inability to fully unify stems from its deeply rooted historical and cultural divisions. Centuries of political fragmentation led to the development of diverse languages, cultures, regional identities, and political traditions. The rise of the nation-state system, solidified by the Treaty of Westphalia in 1648, emphasized national sovereignty over continental unity.

Nationalism in the 19th century further deepened these divisions, as nation-states were formed around distinct cultures, languages, and ethnicities. This made it difficult for European countries to relinquish their differences and come together under one entity, such as the European Union.

Moreover, Europe has seen continuous internal conflict. From the Hundred Years' War to the two World Wars, and even the current Ukraine-Russia conflict, Europe has remained a battleground for power and dominance. Each of these wars reinforced divisions rather than achieving unity.

The 2016 Brexit vote is another example of the tension between national sovereignty and broader European integration, while the collapse of Yugoslavia and its ensuing conflicts reflect how deep-seated ethnic and political grievances continue to hinder unity.

Conclusion

In both China and Europe, the forces of unity and division have continuously shaped their histories. The longer a country remains unified, the harder it is for divisive forces to prevail—and vice versa. China, with its long history of cultural continuity, a unified language, and a strong centralized government, has managed to maintain periods of unity far longer than division. The idea of national rejuvenation and shared identity has only strengthened its unity in modern times.

Europe, on the other hand, has been shaped by centuries of fragmentation, competing sovereignties, and fierce rivalry for dominance. While attempts at unity have been made—most notably through the European Union—the continent's historical divisions remain a formidable challenge.

Ultimately, the balance between forces of unity and division is delicate, and while China may continue to uphold its centralized strength, Europe will likely struggle with its historic tensions. But as history has shown, neither unity nor division is permanent. These cycles continue, influenced by shifting political, social, and external pressures, reminding us that the grand narrative of nations is always evolving.

I shared a post about a group of classmates from Tianjin who dedicated their lives to China’s foreign affairs. One reader commented, “They’re just mouthpieces of the government.”

These words linger in my mind. It’s actually an honor for them. Not everyone can serve that function, and in a way, aren’t we all mouthpieces of something—believers of some sort? We rarely have completely original thoughts or create anything entirely new. Most of us echo the ideas of others or of the country or of their social group, and we are all subject to various limitations. Absolute freedom is an illusion we like to entertain.

Each individual’s path is shaped by personal aspirations, values, allegiances, and sometimes circumstances beyond their control. As the saying goes, “人各有志” (Rén gè yǒu zhì)—everyone has their own ambitions. The key is not only to respect others’ choices but also their loyalty and dedication to something larger than themselves. Ultimately, we are all driven by something that extends beyond personal interests.

It’s more meaningful and sensible to align ourselves with a cause greater than our own desires. In doing so, we may discover a deeper sense of fulfillment and satisfaction by the time we reach retirement.

This larger-than-life perspective reminds me of William Manchester’s The Glory and the Dream: A Narrative History of America, which presents two intertwined themes: glory and the dream. 

The glory celebrates the achievements and aspirations of a nation, highlighting technological advancements, wars and social reforms. Similar glory can be attributed to those who dedicate their lives to the cause of China's foreign affairs.

The dream, epitomized in Martin Luther King Jr.'s "I have a dream" speech, underscores the challenges and disillusionments many face in pursuit of their ideals, such as inequality, racism, and economic hardship. This "dream" embodies both hope and the harsh realities that often accompany it.

By recognizing these dualities, we can better appreciate our roles within the larger story of our societies—where personal dreams meet collective glory.

I had planned to write about something else, but the morning’s TV coverage of an event from last year caught my attention.

October 7, 2024, marks one year since Hamas launched its surprise terrorist attack on Israel. A reporter was covering the anniversary live from Israel.

He reported that the attack had killed 1,200 people, making it the deadliest event for the Jewish people since the Holocaust. He also interviewed locals about the atrocities committed by Hamas.

Of course, there was no mention of Gaza’s situation—apparently not newsworthy. If American mainstream media were my only source of information, I’d know nothing about the tens of thousands of lives lost in Gaza.

The next report focused on the NYPD preparing for campus protests on the anniversary of the attack. Students from at least a dozen college campuses across New York City were planning a walkout. Curious, I searched and discovered that these were pro-Palestinian walkouts. No wonder law enforcement was heavily armed, ready for unarmed students.

Bias exists in all of us, but what I heard that moment was so shocking that I couldn’t ignore it.

At that moment, a saying came to mind: "野火烧不尽, 春风吹又生" (Yě huǒ shāo bù jìn, chūn fēng chuī yòu shēng) — "Wildfires cannot destroy it completely; with the spring breeze, it grows back again." This perfectly encapsulates resilience, symbolizing how even when something is temporarily suppressed, it eventually recovers and thrives, like grass that regrows after a wildfire.

As I reflected on the events of that day and the contrasting narratives presented by the media and my own research, I couldn’t help but think of many things. Whether it's the overlooked lives in Gaza or the heavily reported losses in Israel, our understanding of the world is shaped by what we are told—and what is left unsaid. In a world where every story has two sides, perhaps the greatest challenge is to resist being swept up by one narrative and to seek out the voices that often go unheard.

Finally, keep in mind that the wildfire of protest will never die, that no media, no bias can put it out!

Yesterday I talked to my children about this incident. My youngest sister shared with me something about her son. Tom, the pseudonym for her son, and his parents have a small family social group. During a recent video call, Tom advised his father not to invest recklessly. Later, his father shared a screenshot of an investment in the group. Tom, assuming his father had ignored his advice and invested recklessly again, got so upset that he immediately left the group without hearing his father’s explanation.

In reality, the screenshot was from an old investment his father had made previously. After his mother explained the situation, Tom rejoined the family group and apologized to his father. I think Tom did one thing right here.

At 36, Tom is highly educated, holding two master’s degrees from the U.S., while his father never attended college. His father, however, has a long history of poor investments and significant financial losses. Yet, he’s a smart and stubborn man, unlikely to give up trying his luck in the stock market.

Given this, if I were in Tom’s position, here’s how I’d try to approach the situation:

First, I’d try to understand my father’s perspective. I’d take the time to see why these investments appeal to him and what he hopes to achieve. Maintaining regular communication—through calls or messages—would allow me to support him consistently. Instead of reacting emotionally, I’d focus on understanding his thought process and the rationale behind his decisions.

Second, I’d help him recognize the patterns of his past failed investments. I’d suggest he seek guidance in managing financial risks, perhaps by working with a professional financial advisor who can provide objective advice. I might even help him find a trusted advisor in China to ensure he’s getting sound financial guidance.

Third, I’d establish clear boundaries and expectations. By having an open and honest conversation about the financial impact of his past decisions, I could help him see how these affect our family. Respectfully setting boundaries—like discussing potential investments before making them—would allow me to support him without enabling risky behavior.

Fourth, I’d remain patient and avoid getting emotional. It can be frustrating when someone you care about repeats harmful financial behaviors, but I’d remind myself that change takes time. I’d be willing to invest that time because I care about him. I’d keep communication open and encourage positive financial habits, celebrating small successes when he avoids risky investments or makes prudent decisions.

Yes, the son has many responsibilities with his aging father—call it role reversal—and this is only the beginning.

One last point: Tom’s father believes his son’s political biases regarding China’s market cloud his judgment. He might feel that Tom’s political views prevent him from objectively evaluating the Chinese stock market, potentially causing him to miss out on immense wealth. A Chinese saying, "与泼天的富贵擦肩而过" (Yǔ pō tiān de fùguì cā jiān ér guò), perfectly captures this— "to brush past immense wealth and fortune" or missing out on the wealth just within the grasp.

Perhaps Tom has already tried all of the above. Finally, perhaps Tom already realizes that while political views are deeply subjective, investment decisions should be based on objective analysis. Perhaps the most challenging part is to convince his father that he can separate his political opinions from financial situation and opportunities, and there would not be 与泼天的富贵擦肩而过.